The popular phrase tomboy refers to girls who display many characteristics that are mainly attributed to boys. These are girls who are very spirited and like to run and play sports. They have a lot of energy, dislike dresses, and may have more friends who are boys than girls.
These girls may also like things such as comic books, science fiction, getting dirty, and activities that are rougher as opposed to other girls their own age.
This term isn't being used nearly as often as it was in the 90s, 80s, 70s, and even before, but we still see girls described in this way and labeled. When their daughter shows more of an interest in things that the majority of girls aren't stereotypically supposed to like, parents may wonder if their daughter is going through a phase or if they truly enjoy these interests. Can't it be both?
The word tomboy was first around in the 1550s. According to Etymology Online, the word was at first used to describe a rude boy. In the 1590s, the word tomboy was defined as a "wild, romping girl, a girl who acts like a spirited boy." The word gained in popularity as the media kept portraying tomboy-described girls in books and on TV.
A Tomboy Is Just A Label
A girl being a tomboy doesn't decide her sexuality, gender, or what she will be like as an adult. It's a girl who has interests that are more associated with boys. Most girls do outgrow this phase and move on to have more girl-centric interests.
The Atlantic looked at the history of tomboys and how they've been portrayed in books and the media over the centuries. The 1970s was the golden era of the tomboy inspired by the women's liberation movement.
It appears that most girls outgrow this phase once they hit adolescence. Puberty is a game changer for both girls and boys, and changes happen to both. For girls though, there is pressure to be pretty, and even somewhat demure is very real.
Once girls hit the age of 12 or so, they start to feel the need to conform to both societal pressure and peer pressure.
However, it's ridiculous to say that girls can't like things boys like and vice versa. We are living in a time when gender is being redefined, and we have many individuals who are increasingly finding themselves pushing back against the gender norms we're well accustomed to.
It was just 50 years ago that women and girls were allowed to wear pants in schools and formal settings. Men are taking on more childcare, and more women than ever are working in male-dominated careers.
Tomboys In The Future
The term tomboy is very outdated for some, and even harmful. It's argued that we shouldn't put these labels on our girls and let them enjoy what they want to do and not worry any deeper if this has any deeper implications for their gender identity and sexuality.
It likely doesn't, and you simply have a daughter who likes sports, cars, engineering, Star Wars, getting dirty, and more. And all she wants is your love and support.
When moms and parents use these label on their own daughters, girls can begin to see themselves as just a tomboy and not fee like a typical girl.
The best we can do is just let our daughters like what they want and not put any adult societal expectations on our young daughters who happen to like more boy centric activities.
Source: The Atlantic, Girl Scouts, Bustle